We all have dreams. We all live in reality. The eternal question thus becomes how to turn our dreams into reality. “Oh, you just need to manifest it,” your social circle replies. But how does that actually work? If you’ve tried vision boarding, meditating, and journaling, yet only wound up “manifesting” frustration and disappointment, let’s take an honest look at what you’re hoping to bring in and why.
People often approach manifestation as if it’s a wish list. “I want this Tesla. I want this partner. I want a vacation house in Malibu.” They pick out their gift registry from the universe, become attached to it, visualize it, and grow more attached. This is the opposite of successful manifestation, and hardly ever produces results.
Step One: Surrender
The problem is most people use manifesting as another way to serve their ego, which gets them further off track. The art of manifesting requires shutting off that self-important voice. Having a practice like meditation, breathwork, or yoga — activities that open you up beyond the frenetic busyness of your ego — is a mandatory prerequisite. Before you reach the point where you can design your life at will, manifestation requires substantial surrender. First you must relinquish attachment and impatience to realize that you really don’t need anything to be whole. Really grasp that. How many of us tell ourselves, “I’ll be happy when I have _____”? The magic of manifestation will start to deliver what we desire most only when we understand that we don’t need it to feel a certain way.
When we obsess over the things we want, the things we don’t have, we actually solidify the reality that we don’t have them! By craving and pining and wishing and hoping you end up pushing your desire further away. Instead, try walking with the confident certainty that you’re already abundant and complete in the present moment.
Step Two: Witness
Our egos crave certainty, but you’re more connected to your soul and the soul of the universe once you release the kung-fu grip on having everything “your way.” Step back from your swirl of thoughts and just observe the ego, that demanding little voice that jerks you this way and that, compelling you to compete, complain, and compare. That place of witnessing is where you can recognize how beautifully cared for and provided for you’ve always been. You can look back on your life and think, “Thank God that didn’t work out, even though I was begging for it.” We can’t always see it in the moment, but our highest path is always unfolding, placing the best possible option right in front of us at exactly the right time.
Step Three: Align
Manifestation happens when you’re in alignment, meaning the words that come out of your mouth and the thoughts that pop into your head match the deepest truth in your heart. That’s where the vibration is. Happiness doesn’t come from a pile of stuff, or even a pile of stuff in a big ol’ boat. It’s found in being alive and connected to the blissful flow that surrounds us. What you really want is the feeling of deep fulfillment, freedom, and peace. When you choose to embody that here and now, you’re led to so many things that enrich and enlighten your life. Manifesting is the art of loving exactly who and where you are. Everything else is a byproduct.
Here’s an example from my personal experience. At age 23, I hopped off the plane at LAX, and just like Miley, I wanted a record deal. My ego decided that was my truth. I was going to be the next Taylor Swift, on tour performing in front of thousands every night. I believed I needed that to be whole. But as I continued on my journey, an entirely different path unfolded. The more I meditated on my direction, honing in on my thoughts and purpose, the easier it was to surrender to where I felt my life was headed.
Cut to me now at 44 years old. I have three daughters, and I love staying at home. I write books. I host experiences. I help with homework and fix snacks. I started a podcast that is now top-ranked with 40 million downloads, and I’m growing an eight-figure business that has touched the hearts of hundreds of thousands of people around the world. I live in flow.
You’ll find that when you affix yourself to a specific ego-driven outcome, you’re headed in the wrong direction. The ego presents you with a story called lack and says, “In order for you to find wholeness, this thing needs to happen outside of you. This person has to approve of you. You must obtain this object. Without these you’re not complete, not worthy, not happy.” Manifestation is frequently associated with the law of attraction, but it’s actually the law of reception. That’s why the only thing you manifest from lack is more lack.
The ego is very good at being very loud, and will fill your head with a litany of wants and needs. But when you learn to push past that, and see it for the misguided sense of urgency it is, there’s a softer, more loving whisper inviting you to listen. We often judge that voice as trivial and time-consuming, but these are the messages that point to our greater destiny. This is why we love to root for the underdog and celebrate stories of overcoming hardships, because somewhere deep down we know that riches, acclaim, and notoriety are not the keys to happiness. When you instead choose to channel light, love, and expansion, you are lit from within. As soon as you’re in honest gratitude and humility, in the present moment, you finally begin to manifest. You start to create. You start to heal yourself and others.
It is beyond powerful.
